Updated: Sep 15
Having worked through so much confusion, helplessness and sadness that was present when we arrived to the Männiku metsatalu makes me feel hopeful again. The recent times have been rough on many of us and it is a blessing that we have been able to support each other through it.
I feel that I am filled with the utmost care and happiness. How could it be otherwise if I am surrounded by so many kind and open hearted people.
Can you imagine what a bliss it is to spend an entire week with women and men whose mission is to feel good?
Everyone has come together to be the most loving and nurturing version for themselves and others. The ease in the flow of giving and receiving care between the participants is so inspiring.
And also surrendering to the feelings of discomfort to grow even further into being love.
We created a paradise...
With a small altar in the middle we gathered into a circle to connect with our selves and each other. Holding hands either on our own hearts or with each other we hummed together in resonance and felt the unifying field of collective conscious floating between us.
Tonight is the night when everyone can practice what they have learned throughout the week. The different styles of touch, creating sacred space, connecting to their own bodies and communicating their desires and boundries. Tapping into the consciousness of their loving heart and bringing it to another with love and care.
The sensitivities of our bodies have grown a lot throughout the week thanks to the breath work and meditations we have done. Intuition is sharpened and the presence feels divine.
"It feels so good to surrender into fully trusting the space. The space brought me exactly the right partner to dive into the practice with. I felt uncomfortable with being randomly paired up with him at first but thanks to communicating my boundaries I was able to feel completely safe. Yet as he started with the touch I realised that I had been projecting my own insecurities and fears onto him. He was the most considerate and professional partner I could have asked for. It was great growing for me to see how big misconception I was having about the person based on my own past experience. I feel the space of love growing inside of me and it feels so good to trust another loving being. After the exchange I have him a big hug and was so happy he was my partner in this exercise. I would have never known the amount of love I was keeping away from myself.
I felt special sensations in my body with vibrations, contractions and trembling.
As the second partner massaged my arm I was ready to say that I don’t like to be touched there. In reality, however, I was keeping myself tense and not allowing the energy to move. I was holding onto too much control and being unable to relax. As I used the techniques we learned during the day I was able to let go. After deep relaxation I felt sensations I had never experienced before. It was all so special that I felt like I was getting a massage for the first time in my life! Her touch was so in-tune with the way energy was moving in my body it felt like she was psychic. I began to have visions of angels kissing my skin and blowing dust of love and light all over my body. A tear of bliss fell down my cheek and an overflowing wave of gratitude filled each cell of my body. "
Next morning we started with my favourite Kundalini meditation
At 8 am we gathered for the OSHO Kundalini meditation. It is such a simple but profound way to connect with and uplift the life force energy.
This meditation has bought so much inspiration, dedication, motivation and joy into my life. What a wonderfully easy and fun way to dive deep into altered states of consciousness and get clarity.
It was so nice to shake on the fresh morning grass, dance to the sun and drift away into the emptiness of thought.
Feeling the oneness with the universe a question rose into my mind: " Am I star dust and the air of the universe ?!"
Today we work on the centre on creativity, money and sexuality:
The topics we go through and release are the unwanted feelings of subconscious shame, guilt, pain, and fear that have been accumulated in the tissues of diaphragm and pelvis as a result of various events. We dove deep into the experience and invited the powers of the seen and unseen worlds to support. We started the session with guided meditation, which already activated the body.
Sometimes the trauma feels too painful to face
A lot of things happened during the session and not all of them will be mentioned here. It was a very deep process, during which some had difficulty staying in the body because some inner walls coming up. Facing the pain was probably too scary for some. Losing it means no longer staying with the active breath and no attention in the body. Going to the dream space with the mind wondering around too soon. This means that there is a kind of trauma that the body still holds tight. But we help each other through. We have been preparing to be there for each other and we know how to bring the breath and attention back in a loving way.
After the session we fell asleep under the three oaks that were supporting us
For integration I went and sat in the evening sun to catch its last rays of warmth.
After delicious dinner was time for the smoke sauna and dip in the river right next to it.
As the moon came out we ran on the big swing and allowed the wind to refresh our light bodies.
We shared music and tales under the stars until it was time to go to sleep to wake up for another transformative day.
Tomorrow is the day of connecting to your tribe.